There is a poem by Linda
Ellis that I have always liked, and I would like to share it with you.
The Dash
I read of a man who stood to speak
At the funeral of a friend
He referred to the dates on her tombstone
From the beginning to the end
At the funeral of a friend
He referred to the dates on her tombstone
From the beginning to the end
He noted that first came the date of her birth
And spoke the following date with tears,
But he said what mattered most of all
Was the dash between those years
And spoke the following date with tears,
But he said what mattered most of all
Was the dash between those years
For that dash represents all the time
That she spent alive on earth.
And now only those who loved her
Know what that little line is worth.
That she spent alive on earth.
And now only those who loved her
Know what that little line is worth.
For it matters not how much we own;
The cars, the house, the cash,
What matters is how we live and love
And how we spend our dash.
The cars, the house, the cash,
What matters is how we live and love
And how we spend our dash.
The numerical difference between
the numbers on both sides of Dad’s dash isn’t as long as we would have liked it
to be, but Dad sure filled that dash. He
was so many things to so many people – a husband, a father, a grandfather, a
pastor, a friend and an inspiration to many.
A
husband – Mom, you have been amazing, and I have such admiration and respect
for you. You have cared for Dad, have
been by his side, and have shown him the depths of your love. I am truly grateful for the ways in which you
have taken care of my father and made his last days happier. You have been devoted to making him more comfortable
and have made it your mission to ensure his happiness in being surrounded by
family and friends and to honor his wishes.
It’s hard to think of Mom without Dad, Linda without Wally, and that is
a tribute to the bond and the love that you shared. You were like one going through life hand in
hand, even until the end. I pray that
God gives you the strength that you will need and that God will put His hand in
yours and let you know how loved you are and what a blessed wife and woman you
are. Proverbs 31: 10-12 tells us " A wife of noble character
who can find? She is worth far more than
rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing
of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.”
A
father –I have to tell you that living with dad was a lot like living with
God. It seemed like he knew EVERYTHING, and what he didn't know, my
sisters told him. We didn't just get punished or a speaking to for our
wrongdoings, we got sermons and Bible verses to read and learn and figure out
how they could be applied to our particular transgression. Parents always
say that there is no textbook on how to be a parent, but my Dad used the Bible
as his textbook for life: how to be a good Christian, how to be a good husband,
how to be a good father, etc. I still haven't found in the Bible where it
said "Thou shalt not wear make-up until you are 16" or "Thou
shalt not get your ears pierced until you are 18", but it must be in there
in some form. Dad has instilled in me
and my siblings many of his own characteristics. Some of us love basketball and football the
way he did, although none of us have mastered the excited gesture he would do
when his team was winning. Some of us
are stubborn and will debate to the end when we believe passionately that we
are right. Some of us are calm and
listen the way he did so many times. All
of us are helpful and will rush to help when we are needed. All of us love each other and although we
don’t say it often enough, it is an unstated truth, and we are extremely loyal
and would do anything for each other, even fight someone when we thought they
said something bad about a sister. We
like to joke and kid each other, and sometimes in doing so, we hurt each other’s
feelings. We like to discuss who Dad’s
favorite is, and though we have come to the conclusion that we all have had
that coveted spot at one time or another in our lives, I must remind you that I
will always be #1.
A
grandfather – Our children will have many memories of Grandpa and others that
we will share with them as they grow older.
Grandpa used to like to hold the babies, particularly when they were
fussy and soothe them with his sweet rendition of The Old Rugged Cross. They always stopped crying, and we’re not
sure if it’s because it was soothing or because they wanted him to stop
singing. Grandpa enjoyed cheering on his
grandchildren at their baseball and softball games, football games and hockey
games and enjoyed sitting in the audience at school concerts and band
performances. Grandpa liked when they
were mischievous as he would smile a little mischievously himself and say,
“This is fun because they are your kids.”
Grandpa made everything a little extra special just with his presence,
and he loved you all so much.
A pastor – Grandpa works for God.
That was the best way to explain Grandpa’s job to our children. A few weeks ago, we sat in this very church
as about 300 people gathered to share what my Dad’s Christian service has meant
to them. What a beautiful tribute to a
man who spent his life sharing what was once shared with him – the love of God
for us. For 41 years my dad was a
pastor. He started 2 churches – one in
Southbridge and then one in Dudley and then went on to pastor 2 different
Worcester churches and then to have a pastoral role here at Faith Baptist. And people came that day, not only from those
churches but from community projects that he worked on and boards on which he
served. Dad touched people and left an
impression, not only by the words preached from the pulpit, but by the godly
life he led.
A friend – Looking around at all the
faces here today, it is such a tribute to the person Dad was, to see all of
you, some his parishioners, some his friends or both, as those went hand in
hand with Dad. Every single one of you
has touched Dad’s life in some way, the same way that he has touched yours, and
we are all richer just for having known him.
Dad loved his family and friends, and the times that he spent with all
of you were treasured by him, especially when they involved coffee or potluck
dinners. And I thank God for all of you,
for your prayers, your love, your concern and your friendship over the years
and during this journey of Dad’s.
What
an inspiration Dad has been – his strength and his faith will not be
forgotten. During his run with cancer,
Dad often said, “How can I use my cancer to reach others for Jesus?” and when I
cried that it wasn’t fair and questioned why, he told me that God had a
plan. We may not understand it or see
it, but we are not to question God’s plan for us. And how many of you got the medical updates
my parents would regularly send where on more than one occasion, bad news would
be followed by a pep talk from Dad or Mom with a Christian message and/or Bible
verse. How amazing is that! Dad exhibited a faith and a hope that
inspired and spoke to many. So yes, Dad,
you used your cancer to continue to reach others for Jesus.
